Guys and Nails Just Don’t Get Along

I’ll be the first to admit that my nails are pretty hideous. Short, ragged and unkept as can be, with not a single drop of moisturizing lotion on ’em. But I’m a guy, they’re supposed to be. Sure I work on the computer all day, but when the work day is pau, I do guy stuff. I play sports, change my own oil, and drink beer (sometimes in that order).

Once in a great while, this one, overachieving finger of mine is successful in growing its nail to a normal length. When it does, I like to see how long I can keep it going before it joins the others back to ugly-hood. That “normal” time is now. But I find that doing the most basic of tasks is a challenge. I can’t imagine how hard things would be if all of my fingers were sissy like this.

My Nails

Over the past few days, I’ve been documenting the goods and the bads of having a long nail, and wanted to throw it out there to see if anyone else had any positives (or negatives) that would make me want to keep this thang a-growing.


  • Tying shoelaces
  • Pushing the button on my car stereo
  • Typing
  • That non-stop, “fingernails-on-the-chalkboard” feeling whenever I scratch something.


  • Scratching things or picking food out of my teeth (or digging for gold! Mahalo Bruddah Lee! 😛 )
  • Precise button/menu pressing on my touch screen phone
  • Opening soda/beer cans with ease
  • Throwing a mean knuckleball
  • Can wag my finger, shake my head and say “Oh no you di-in’t!” with authority.

Talk to me…

My Monday Night Reality Show Updates:
– Flavor of Love 3 – Flavor Flav brought back fan favorite Thing 2. YES! Now it’s between her, “Black” and that repulsive “Sinceer”.
– The Hills – Heidi refocuses her energy at Bolthouse Productions (who really cares!?) and Lauren and Audrina drift further apart. Awww!

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One Response to “Guys and Nails Just Don’t Get Along”

  1. Happy Birthday to WWE-eeeeee! | World Wide Ed Says:

    […] think I’m finally getting the hang of this. No more posts about nails, my broken mandible or MMA. I heard you (or rather I didn’t hear you at all in the comments) […]

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